Desert Rose
by The Tooth Fairy
Summary: Yami has a body and is dating Seto. The link between Yugi and Yami is severed. Yami wants Yugi as well as Seto, who has no problem with it. But Yugi has a new yami, Elf. Elf and Yugi are together and like Bakura. Elf does NOT like Yami. YugiOC
1. The Puzzle interferes

Disclaimer: I don't own anything except Elf so don't expect anything.

I don't really like Yami xYugi pairings so i decided to bring in a newbie for Yugi.

**Chapter one.**

In a dark room a small figure lay on a messy bed, his deepest violet eyes gleaming behind a sheen of tears.

Beside the bed, the sound system played the song '_Desert Rose' _by Sting, drowning out the sounds coming from the room down the hall.

'_**I dream of rain**_

I dream of gardens in the desert sand 

_**I wake in pain**_

_**I dream of love as time runs through my hands'**_

The boy turned to lie on his side just as a cloud glided off the moon, caressing the room in pale moonlight.

Damp tri-color hair lay limp and straight across his shadowed child-like face, pouty red Cherub lips parted as they mouthed the words to the song, as a small and delicate long-fingered hand lay half-curled on the sheet.

'_**I dream of fire **_

_**These dreams are tied to a horse that will never tire**_

_**And in the flames**_

_**Her shadows play in the shape of a mans desire'**_

Yugi flinched as Yami's shriek tore through the house. It wasn't a pained shriek either.

The hand clenched in the sheet and the tears started falling.

On the bedside table, the Millennium Puzzle started to glow.

'_**This desert rose**_

_**Each of her veils, a secret promise**_

**This desert flower **

_**No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this'**_

The boy's eyes flicked up to stare at the glowing Puzzle, confusion written across his face.

He sat up, his hair falling like a curtain around his face and shoulders, his purple eyes staring from behind golden bangs as his hand reached for the object that had started all the problems to begin with.

'_**And as she turns**_

_**This way she moves in the logic of all my dreams**_

_**This fire burns**_

_**I realize that nothing's as it seems**_

As those slender fingers touched the Puzzle, it flared.

'_**I dream of rain**_

_**I dream of gardens in the desert sand**_

_**I wake in pain**_

_**I dream of love as time runs through my hands'**_

Yugi's hand snapped up to shield his face as the light encompassed the room but he left enough room between his fingers to see if anything happened.

'_**I dream of rain**_

_**I lift my gaze to empty skies above**_

_**I close my eyes, this rare perfume**_

_**Is the sweet intoxication of her love'**_

When the light died down, a naked figure lay on the floor. Yugi took a step forward, half hopeful, half scared.

The figure on the floor stirred and the pale light illuminated the smooth dark skin of his back, the line of one long and lean leg and the graceful angle of a lithe out-flung arm.

'_**I dream of rain**_

_**I dream of gardens in the desert sand **_

_**I wake in pain**_

_**I dream of love as time runs through my hands'**_

Yugi reached out a tentative hand and touched warm, almost hot skin.

Yugi flinched and would have pulled back when the boy on his floor rolled onto his back if a tanned, long-fingered hand hadn't flashed out and grabbed his wrist.

Eyes of deepest violet met eyes of palest lavender.

'_**Sweet desert rose**_

_**Each of her veils, a secret promise**_

_**This desert flower**_

_**No sweet perfume ever tortured me more than this'**_

The face that hit the moonlight was a darker version of Yugi's. While it was almost exactly the same, the face was obviously the face of someone else, maybe a brother's.

The face was slightly narrower than Yugi's, an ivory brown that was obviously natural. His lips were fuller and more kissable than Yugi's, not by much though, and the eyes were exotically tilted and seductively heavy lidded. Around the boy's neck was another replica of the Millennium Puzzle.

'_**Sweet desert rose**_

_**This memory of Eden haunts us all**_

_**This desert flower, this rare perfume**_

**Is the sweet intoxication of the fall'**

The other bronze hand reached up and ran down the light's cheek in an almost familiar gesture before continuing down his neck, his shoulder, his arm and entwining dark fingers with pale ones.

Yugi spoke in a whisper. "Who are you?"

The boy smiled up at his new light with the kind of smile the snake must have given Eve, gentle and vaguely dark. "Who do you want me to be?"

Yugi lowered his face 'til was a hair's breath away from the others and whispered his answer into his mouth. "Someone who won't leave me…"

Pleez reveiw.


	2. Wake up

Disclaimer: Don't bother. I don't own anything except Elf.

**Chapter Two.**

Yugi yawned and stretched as sunlight poured through the open blinds, vaguely wondering why he ached like he did.

Then his arm hit something warm.

He glanced at what lay beside him and squeaked.

The boy smiled a lazy, seductive smile, yawned and stretched, revealing a long line of toned tanned flesh.

"G' morning. Great night, huh?" the boy purred in a husky voice.

Yugi flushed as he realized he'd been caught gaping. Well that explained the aching in his lower back.

Then something else occurred to him. "What's your name, anyway?"

The boy actually blinked a couple of times and genuinely seemed to think about it. Finally, he looked at Yugi and stated firmly, "Elfinite."

Yugi blinked at the boy cutely. "Infinite?"

The tanned boy sat up and shook out his long spiky hair, somehow reminding Yugi of Malik's blonde locks. "No, no, no. Elfinite. Elf-in-ite. Though it means the same thing as infinite. But you can call me Elf." Elf gave Yugi a sideways look from half-lidded lavender eyes and his lips managed to curl into a snarl that spoke of nothing but raw fucking. Those pale, pale purple eyes roved over the lithe body of his light, and he licked his lips.

Yugi saw the look and started edging towards the side of the bed. Just as the nervous light reached the edge, Elf pounced, taking the both of the side of the bed in a tangle of sheets and limbs.

"Yugi? What was that sound? Are you alright?" Both boys froze in a position that could have been the beginning of a fight or something more private, when they heard Yugi's Grandpa coming down the hall towards the room.

Yugi looked around wildly, before shoving the protesting Elf under the bed, flailing arms and all. The light turned around just in time to see Grandpa opening the door and step into the room, Yami and Seto close behind him.

Grandpa frowned severely at the King of Games. "What was that sound, Yugi?"

_/You fell out of bed. /_ Elf's voice echoed around his mind.

"I fell out of bed." Yugi felt a nervous smile appearing on his face.

Grandpa glanced at the sheet that Yugi had half wrapped around his waist. "Alright. Get ready for school, it's nearly 8:15."

Yugi bobbed his head. "Okay, Grandpa."

Grandpa nodded and left the room. Yami and Seto stared at Yugi with almost identical, yet unreadable looks on their faces before following the old man out of the room, closing the door behind them.

Yugi let out a loud sigh and turned back to the bed.

Elf popped up from the other side of the bed and leaned on the sheets, looking to Yugi so incredibly…so incredibly _fuckable._

Elf saw the look and tilted his head slightly so his own lightning bangs fell into his eyes. "Shower?" was asked in a crooning purr.

Yugi blinked and nodded firmly. "Shower."

If i don't start getting reveiws i think i'll just quit while i still have my illusions that i can right.


	3. There's Something About Ryou

**Chapter Three.**

Yugi walked towards his friends in homeroom, doing his best to ignore the crude comments his new Yami was making about the length of a girl's skirt or the way pants clung across a guy's butt.

Just as he sat down, Bakura, Malik, Marik and Ryou entered the room and Elf's lewd comments went into overdrive at how tight the Three Psychos' pants were.

Ryou walked up, sat in his seat in front of Yugi, turned around and gave the Light a quick smile before turning back around when the teacher walked in.

Elf was silent a moment before commenting in a dreamy tone, _/ He looks like a screamer…/ _Yugi's face burned and he bowed his head, hoping his hair covered the oven that was his face. Elf continued, apparently not having noticed his light's discomfort. Too bad three other people had noticed and were watching with vivid attention._ / He'd be great with his mouth too, and he'd make all the right sounds at all the right times. Looks pretty flexible. He'd be a creative top and an even better bottom. Wouldn't mind being tied up and he'd like to watch. He'd be quiet then. He'd just lay there looking all hot and horny; not comments, no compliments, but Ra, he'd look just so incredibly **fuckable**…/_

_/You sound like a prostitute. / _Yugi snapped at his dreaming Twilight. _/ Now can you shut up about Ryou so I can get some work done without getting a raging hard on/_

Elf sniffed in a dejected fashion. _/ I know where I'm not wanted. /_ And, with one last sniff, he turned and went into his soulroom, slamming the door.

Yugi sighed and turned back to his work, knowing that tonight he'd have to give some serious make-up sex to his neo-Yami.

"Well?"

Malik and Marik turned to Bakura with identical glazed looks.

Malik spoke first. "Wow…"

"What?" Bakura hissed.

Marik giggled, bathing in what had to be afterglow. "Yeah, 'Wow'."

Bakura glared at the other two Psychos. "Just tell me already!"

Malik shook his head in an effort to clear it. Then he grinned at the peeved Yami. "Not only is there someone new in Yugi's head, but that someone just told Yugi, in great detail I might add, what your Ryou would be like in bed." Malik shuddered, and it wasn't from cold.

Bakura grew still. "What did you say?"

Yugi closed his locker and sighed.

Elf had been silent since that morning, but Yugi could feel him sulking in his soulroom. During lunch, Yugi had found an empty tree and bolted up it, hiding in the branches to eat his lunch free of bullies and worried 'friends'. Every time Yugi had tried to talk to Elf, all he'd received was an indignant 'humph'.

Yugi grabbed the books he needed for that night and slunk off down the hall, making himself as unnoticeable as possible.

"Yugi!"

A glance confirmed that it was Yami and Kaiba. Again.1

Yugi panicked, dreading having to walk home with the gruesome twosome. So he pretended he didn't hear his dark call him and skiddadled around the corner. Not that that would deter the ex-pharaoh.

/_To your left! Go over to Bakura and give him your books/ _Elf spoke up for the first time since his last 'humph'.

_/But-/_

_/Do it! It's your only venue of escape/_

Yugi hesitated for a moment, weighing the chances, before he streaked over to the semi-psycho.

"Bakura…?"

Said yami glanced at the fragile-seeming light. "What?"

"Hold these." Yugi shoved his books into the startled tombrobber's arms before pausing for orders.

/_Get into his locker and close the door! Don't ask questions! The Pharaoh'll be comin' around the corner in t-minus ten seconds/_

Yugi winced slightly before stuffing himself into the dark, smelly locker and closing the door with a 'clang!'

Through the slots in the door, Yugi saw Bakura looking puzzled and annoyed. Seconds later, just as Bakura opened his mouth to most likely demand that Yugi get out of said locker, Yami and Kaiba jogged around the corner, sparing only a habitual glare at their archenemy.

Bakura stared after the two for a moment before turning his speculating glare to the locker.

/_Can I use your body for a sec? It'll be faster than giving you orders. /_

_/…I'll probably regret this, but okay. /_

Elf paused a moment to get used to the body and give the gruesome twosome (He grinned at the nickname his adorable little sex kitten had given to the ex-Pharaoh and the CEO) time to get a sufficient distance away before he carelessly kicked the door open and poked his head out. He looks to the right. He looks to the left. He's in the clear!2

Elf gave a wolf smile full of teeth, stepped out of the locker like it was the most common thing in the world and looked at the tomb robber. He looked down at his Hikari's books, which were being held at crotch level. Elf looked up at Bakura with a cocked eyebrow and pursed his lips speculatively.

"You gonna give those back or are you using them to hide something?" Elf wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, leering.

Elf's teasing was rewarded with a faint blush from Bakura and the books shoved into his chest while Yugi was laughing himself silly with disbelief.

Elf grinned wider and bowed with a flourish. "Thank you very muchly." Pivoting in his heel, Elf skipped off down the hall like a Demented Scary-Fairy of DOOM! ™ high on Raid™ fumes right before it crashes.3

1 It wasn't as though Yugi needed to walk home with those two, who spent their time making eyes at each other and saying double-innuendo comments about things that they thought innocent little Yugi wouldn't comprehend. It was downright sickening how those two drooled over each other.

2 Elf, it so happens, is a fan of contact sports. I.e. Football, ice hockey, wrestling, etc.

3 That is to say, he bounced down the hall in an aimless fashion, singing suitable songs as like '_Grandpa Got Run Over By A Beer Truck_' and '_Poisoning Pigeons In The Park_' in a slightly hyper-uber-cheerful off-key voice.


	4. I Am Not Your Doll

**_Disclaimer:_** Ya know the drill. i only own Elfy-boy.

Sorry it's late. I've had lotsa assignments.

* * *

**_Chapter Four_**

Elf, still in control of Yugi's body, skipped cheerfully into the living part of the Kame Game shop, cheerfully whistling 'The Pirate Song'. When he reached the kitchen, where Yami and Kaiba were waiting for him, he frowned with bemused innocence at them, turned on the puppy eyes, and cocked his head to the side, hands demurely behind his back and right leg positioned behind the left. All in all, it was reminiscent of an innocent curiously wondering puppy that didn't really know why everyone was yelling and upset.(1)

"Where have you been?" Yami demanded as he stood and stalked towards 'his' light, his whole body language screamed anger, protectiveness and possessiveness.

Elf went on his guard.

**_Breaking my back just to know your name  
Seventeen tracks and I've had it with this game  
I'm breaking my back just to know your name  
But heaven aint close in a place like this  
Anything goes but don't blink you might miss_**

Elf continued to play Yugi on the off-chance Yami notice the shift in control. Said neo-yami beamed at the former dark, eyes sparkling with innocence, joy and amusement. What came out of those tempting rosy lips was definitely not what Yami, Seto and the listening-in Yugi were expecting.

"I stopped off for a quick make-out with my boyfriend."

_**'Cos heaven aint close in a place like this  
I said heaven aint close in a place like this  
Bring it back down bring it back down tonight  
Never thought I'd let a rumor ruin my moonlight**_

Yami paled and physically recoiled in shock and denial, Seto choked, his eyes bugging, and dropped the glass of water he was holding onto the floor where it shattered. Yugi sent Elf an amusing image of himself in a revealing little red devil suit rubbing his hands together and cackling with glee while chanting 'Fun! Fun! Fun!'

_**But somebody told me you had a boyfriend who looked like a girlfriend  
That I had in February of last year  
Its not confidential  
I've got potential**_

Elf let part of his own vindictive personality seep through as he gave the other dark a slightly vicious leer.

"What? Didn't you think my hormones were active yet? I'm eighteen and at my age, no one's _that_ innocent. And it's not like you're _quiet_ when you screw each other. Why do you think I play music all night when Kaiba's over?"

Yami was blushing by now and well and truly mortified. Seto was staring at the tip of his left shoe but you could just make out a blush.

**_Ready lets roll onto something new  
Taking its toll that I'm leaving without you  
'Cos heaven aint close in a place like this  
I said heaven aint close in a place like this  
Bring it back down bring it back down tonight  
Never thought I'd let a rumour ruin my moonlight  
_**

Elf nodded to himself in satisfaction, turned and bounced towards the stairs. He got onto the first step before Yami grabbed 'his' wrist and yanked him off balance before dragging Elfy-boy over to the table. He was swung off-balance again and all but thrown into one of the kitchen chairs. It took more willpower than he cared to admit, but Elf really wanted to hiss at Yami, pounce on him sand start chewing his ear off like a rabid dropbear(2).

_**Well somebody told me you had a boyfriend who looked like a girlfriend  
that I had in February of last year  
Its not confidential  
I've got potential**_

**_A rushin a rushin around_**

/_Can I hurt him/_

_/Not too badly. He might get suspicious…but feel free to abuse the fuck out of his ego. He needs taking down a few notches./_

Elf was distracted from the mental laying of rules by Yami pinning the body's wrist to the armrests and shoving his tongue down the possessed boy's throat.

Elfy chose that moment to go catatonic.

**_Pace yourself from me (from me)  
I said maybe baby please (please)  
But I just don't know now (maybe baby)  
When all I wanna do is try_**

**_  
_**The Hikari and Yami were in complete agreement…

/**_/THE FUCK/_**/

Yami moved back with a self-satisfied smirk, a little saliva pulling away with him to cling a moment before snapping.

Elf just sat there, violet eyes wide, staring and glazed, skin pale, lips half-open and swollen, eyebrows hitched up under his bangs and looking like they were staying there for the honeymoon. Seto moved up behind Yami to wrap his arms around his lover's waist. Unlike his lover, however, he looked more wary and resigned to the fact that 'Yugi' was not reacting well to Yami's advances.

_**  
But somebody told me you had a boyfriend who looked like a girlfriend  
that I had in February of last year  
Its not confidential  
I've got potential  
A rushin a rushin around**_

Elf jerked forward slightly, his mouth snapped closed and he swallowed, expression not changing but his knuckles were white where they were clenched around the armrest. He raised his shell-shocked gaze to the two other youths, Yami's smirk widened but any hope that remained in Seto faded.

Elf gagged, his hand snapping to his mouth. He shot to his feet and bolted to the bathroom where loud retching could be heard, followed by gargling and the sounds of teeth being rapidly and harshly scrubbed.

Needless to say, Yami wasn't quite so smug anymore. More like horrendously insulted.****

But somebody told me you had a boyfriend who looked like a girlfriend  
that I had in February of last year  
Its not confidential  
I've got potential  
A rushin a rushin around

A few minutes later, the Darkness staggered into the kitchen doorway and cast his slightly, (okay, really) wild gaze around the room before settling on the Pharaoh. The gaze then turned all narrowed and evil (insert fiery background and 'you're gonna get it' music)

The one word he said was a hiss way beyond pissed off. More like a 'you-are-pond-scum-and-you-shall-be-smited-for-pissing-me-off' snarl.

The word? "**_You…!" _**

Somebody told me you had a boyfriend who looked like a girlfriend  
that I had in February of last year  
Its not confidential  
I've got potential  
A rushin a rushin around.

Before the other could blink, the Darkness had crashed tackled Yami out of Seto's arms and was pounding his fists into anything from lower chest to forehead. Blood splattered up pale arms and a bit made it's way onto the pale face before Seto halled him up and tossed the smaller boy across the room where he twisted and landed like a cat, hissing and all.

The Darkness that was the merging of Elfinite and Yugi straightened and pointed a finger at Yami, who stared at him like he couldn't believe what had happened from his position half-supported by Seto's arms. Darkness spoke clearly and proscicly, his face regal and cold in his rage.

"I am not your doll."

He turned and stalked outside into the fading light and glowing orange sunset, not realizing what a drama queen he looked like as he strode down the street. Less than a block from the shop, the two personalities separated, exhausted from the effort of maintaining the Darkness Form. Elf swayed slightly before continuing.

/_Sleep, little one. I will take us to a safe place./_ Elf told his light, voice rough but gentle with exhaustion.

/_Where are we going…/ _Yugi asked, his own voice barely a murmur.

_/To Bakura's./_

_/Ah…/_

* * *

1 It should be noted that this usually occurred after several bings, bangs and booms occur, shortly followed by spontaneous combustion and/or explosions, courtesy of the puppy in question. Or it could have just let wind. Whatever.

2 It's an Australian joke. They're supposed to be bears that drop out of trees and latch onto your face.


	5. Repressed Cookies

Sorry it's late. Really really late. I've had trials and studying and stuff, so i haven't had much time to work on this story. Plus a bit of writers block. Meh.

**Disclaimer: Dun own anything except Elfy. And the general storyline.

* * *

__****Chapter Five**

Yugi rolled over, too tired to really bother waking up. He was warm, he was safe, he was comfortable and he had that nice fuzzy feeling of well being you have when you're not quite asleep and not quite awake. He was content to just drift through this realm of thick warm mist and hot orange water. Elf was here too. Yugi lay half-in, half-out of the water against Elf's chest and in his arms.

/_…What is this/_ Yugi wondered idly.

Elf shifted slightly in his kneeling position, smiling sleepily into his kitten's hair. /_/This is my Soulroom./_

Yugi yawned cutely, stretched, rubbing his eyes and before snuggling into Elf's chest. Elf's _bare_ chest.

Yugi pulled back slightly out of habit, before he stopped and snuggled closer(1).

They lay like that for a while before Yugi pondered aloud something that had been bugging him for some time. And that awe-inspiring question that had caused much agonized pondering for centuries(2) …

/…_Do you think a vegetarian would eat animal shaped cookies/_

_/…Yugi…where do you come up with this crap/ _There was a silence(3).

_/Dunno. Same place I got the whole theory for gravity./_

Silence.

/…_Gravity's a myth, you know. Earth just sucks./_

More silence flowed in Yugi's direction.

_/…Huh. Yeah…Whatever./_

Elfy laughed. _/Who the hell needs a comedy channel when they've got you prattling aboutuseless shit like this/_

_/Hey! I'm not-/_

Yugi was interrupted by someone clearing their throat.

**I hope I'm not interrupting anything. **

_/Nope./_

Yugi craned his neck forward and smile, waving with his free hand. _/Hi, Bakura. Whatcha doin' in here/_

Indeed, Bakura was standing in his skillfully rumpled school uniform, up to his ankles in water and hand on hip. Drool worthy.

**I could ask you the same thing, what with you turning up on my doorstep, ready to drop from exhaustion. Not to mention I didn't know anyone could have two yamis at once. **

Both Motous looked surprised, but Yugi answered._ / Who? Yami? Nah. He stopped being my yami when he got a body and severed the link between us./_

Bakura nodded. **That explains the pharaoh, but not him.** He motioned to Elf with his head.

_/I can answer that./_ Elf shifted and changed his usual naughty smirk for an expression of serious contemplation. _/ As you know, a yami is the darker part of the hikari's soul. If anything happens to the hikari, it can be expected that the same would happen to the yami and visa-versa. Now, when Yami severed the link, Yugi found himself missing part of himself that was essential to his existence, because Yami, being the control-freak he is, repressed any 'negatively influenced' emotions-/_

_/Like lust and anger./_

Elf sighed in annoyance. _/ Like lust and anger, thus making Yugi easier to control. Anyhow, when Yami's influence suddenly disappeared from Yugi's mind, his mindset was forced to mature too quickly, expelling all this emotional excess. Yugi, in an unconscious attempt to fill the void Yami left, fashioned the emotional excess into another consciousness, which the Millenum Puzzle, who's sentient by the way, then manifested into a yami who wouldn't use Yugi as a means to an end. Thus, I, Elfinite, came into existence./_

There was a long contemplative silence as Bakura pondered over this new information and how it could be turned to his advantage.

**So…what do you want me to tell the third wheel hammering on my front door?**

Elf growled and pull Yugi closer. /_Nothing. We're not here. Yugi left the Puzzle with you and took off to who-knows-where./_

**Kay.**

It was noted on both sides that the other hadn't answered a question.

* * *

1 On the grounds that '_Hey, I've already screwed him, so what am I complaining about'_.

2Or at least a decade.

3 There was a bottomless quality to Elf's silences. And also a certain directional componant. Yugi later learnt to dread these silences. He always fell for it. He always tried to fill it up. It was suspected it was revenge for the Dewy Kicked Puppy Eyes™.


	6. Oops?

**_Disclaimer: Dun own it._**

Sorry it's so late, i've had other stuff going on so i couldn't get to my computer.

* * *

Elf stretched and laid the still sleeping Yugi on a flat warm sandstone boulder to rest a little longer while he went Out.

The Yami moved through the shin deep water to the oriental redwood and ivory paper sliding door, opened it and moved into Yugi's Soulroom, noticing that the orange hued water stopped dead at the doorframe like a piece of glass was holding it back.

As soon as Elf stepped into the Hikari's Soulroom, he winced at the freezing cold midnight blue marble floor. Though, granted, the room he was in looked nothing like it belonged to Light. Everything was in blues, purples, wine reds, blacks and shades of grey. There was a massive darkwood four-poster on the other side of the equally massive room, covered in midnight blue satin blankets, splashed with pillows of purple, black, grey and wine red. Around the bed were sheer billowy curtains the same shades as the covers and pillows. Placed along the walls around the room were Japanese trees moulded into a variety of graceful shapes that formed symbols for health, protection, wealth and so forth. In the wall directly opposite the bed was a waterfall feature that fell over dark brown rock, into a pool-sized grotto filled with massive bright flame-coloured goldfish and partially surrounded by bamboo reeds. Rainforest sounds tinkled through the air to mesh with the sound of falling water.

In addition to the plants, every here and there, imbedded in the tiles, were numerous puzzles and board games. In the walls were Indian palace style arch windows lined in painted patterns and looking out into a Zen garden.

Elf contemplated the room before deciding he liked it better than the one before it, and continued over to and out the darkly lacquered gothic door. Pity the room's dimensions were so totally out of whack. Somehow he didn't think the walls were supposed to be curved out like that, not to mention that pool was on the ceiling with the water falling up.

Elf blinked Yugi's body's eyes and peered around what he could only assume was Bakura's room. The collection of weapons, money, jewellery and assorted stolen odds and ends, some stained with a suspicious rusty substance, laying on most available surfaces, surrounded by trash, dirty dishes and unwashed clothes were a dead give away. That and the 'DEATH TO PHARAOH' graffiti on the walls.

Elf shook his head and ran a hand through his slightly knotted and blood encrusted hair. He noted with disgust that he was still wearing the clothes when he beat the shit out of Yami, a tentative touch to his face confirmed that Bakura hadn't even bothered to clean of his face.

"Stingy bastard."

Elf rolled his shoulders and got out of the…nest of blankets and left the den in favour of finding the bathroom and having a long hot show. A quick detour into Ryou's room for a pair for jeans told him it was 11:32AM on Saturday, nearly five days since he'd blacked-out.

The yami entered Ryou's clean sparkling white bathroom and started stripping, shedding flakes of dried blood on the floor, and leaving reddish-brown smears on the slightly damp walls where he leant against them. He dumped the Puzzle into the basin to soak as he stepped into the steaming hot water.

He must have been in there for at least an hour when, unknown to him, the bathroom door opened and Ryou walked in to share the shower, thinking it was just Bakura, who didn't really care if he had to share.

Elf was running a comb through his newly conditioned hair when there was a sound behind him that sounded somewhere between a gasp and a squeak. He turned around.

It would also happen to be at that time that Yugi woke up.

/ '_Morning Elf. What's u-/_

Yugi's voice cut off when he looked through Elf's eyes and saw a shock, mortally embarrassed and only half-dressed Ryou.

There was silence except for the sound running water, in which time Ryou's eyes widened another fraction of a foot, Yugi started cursing long and loud in Elf's head, and Elfy-Boy was struggling to keep his eyes on Ryou's face. When Ryou spoke, it was a breathless, disbelieving squeak.

"Yugi!"

A trickle of blood ran from Ryou's nose a moment before he whirled and tried to run out the door.

Key word 'tried'. Bakura came through the door as Ryou was going out.

The poor, scandalised light's head hit the wall with a loud 'crack'.

Bakura looked at Elf, still trying to understand what had happened. The saner yami shrugged.

"Oops?"

* * *

Pleez review


	7. The Pharaoh's a Rooster

Ever had some jerk stare down their noses at you as if you were not even close to being worthy enough to be something gross on their shoes in need of being scraped off? As if you were one of the ten most horrible things on the face of the planet and therefore in need of a quick and simple death? Or how about like you were a simple minded peon and they were Lord of Every freaking thing including the very air you breathed?

Well, Bakura was dealing with 'some jerk' at the moment who happened to be Yugi Motou's ex-Yami. And once Pharaoh of Egypt.

Bakura didn't give a rat's _ass_ what the twit was and was _this _close to storming down the steps of the apartment building to the plain concrete landing and wringing his tanned neck. Or taking that longish spiked hair and wrapping it into a ball and shoving it so far down the smug prick's throat that he'd be anally backtracked for weeks. Months. **_YEARS_**. As petty as those were, they were merely the beginning of Bakura's idea of torture for the bastard Pharaoh.

Hate was too weak a word and was thus used loosely to describe his animosity towards the other _other _half of his protégé, and there had not yet been a word created that would begin to cover it. So, hate would do till then.

Ahem, anyways.

"He's not here. Why in the deepest pits of Hell's basement would your entirely too innocent Hikari come to the home of your only currently active rival whom you haven't screwed to your side, anyway? Especially since he knows that Ryou has piano lessons tonight and won't be back for another hour."

How Bakura even recognised the brainless chicken through the bruises, he had no idea. Oooh. That's an idea. Lets look into this, shall we? Overbearing? Check. Crows whenever possible? Check. Saunters around like he owns the place? Check. Beats down anyone who rises to challenge him? Check. A rooster's comb on his head? Check. Dumb as a doornail? Keeps on running around when his head's been cut off? Bizarre facial colours and markings (Grin)? Check, check and check. Whaddya know? The Pharaoh's a rooster!

Bakura blinked, but didn't dine to answer, because, hey, let's face it, he wasn't paying attention to the question, so he just folded his arms across his chest and stared down his nose at the Royal Pain and hoped he would just _go away_.

Thankfully, the Priest interceded before the Pharaoh got too worked. "He's right, love." It took more will-power than Bakura was willing to admit not to fake a gagging motion. "He's probably at a friends house somewhere. He'll come back once he cools down."

Yami gave his lover a tired look. "But we've already tried the others."

"No. You've tried _your_ friends." Yami and Seto turned to look at Bakura, surprised. Said boy made a disgusted sound and rolled his eyes. "You've hardly been there for him how long? His 'friends' pay more attention to you than they do to him, so it was only natural that he seek out new friends who wouldn't ignore him. Even I noticed _that_." Yami scowled, but before he could say anything, Bakura cast his parting line before turning and stalking back into the hall and down to the apartment owned by his light. "He's probably with his boyfriend, Elf. He's very possessive."

Yami and Seto stayed on the landing in the stairwell for a few more moments. "Did everyone know about Yugi's boyfriend but us?"

"How'd it go?"

Bakura smirked as he watched Elf play with an unconscious Ryou's snowy cloud of hair while half-draped suggestively over the boy's body as it lay on the lounge. Elf moved his free hand to trail it down Ryou's chest and abdomen, all the while smirking suggestively at the other dark

"How does Yugi feel about you using his body to fondle his friend?" Baura inquired, but making no move to stop the smaller yami.

Elf gave him a half-coy, half-knowing grin and a one-shoulder shrug, watching the tomb raider from beneath his oh-so-long lashes. "Yugi doesn't mind. You forget, I was born from his repressed thoughts and feelings. If they hadn't been repressed before he met Ryou, Yugi would probably have had him flat on his back ages ago." Elf giggled and hugged the unconscious boy closer. "He's such a little sex kitten."

Bakura's eyebrow hiked up for a moment before he snorted and made for the kitchen for his daily ration of cream puffs.


	8. Very Bored, Very Bad

**Disclaimer: I own only Elf and tyhe general plot. Thank you for your cooperation. Have a nice day.**

It took a while, but it's here. Enjoy.

* * *

"Oops? OOPS?! Your give Ryou the shock of his life and a concussion and ALL YOU CAN SAY IS 'OOPS'?!"

Ryou frowned, the yelling was making his head hurt even more.

"Well, I'd like to see you come up with something better after having those big brown eyes ogling you while you were in the shower."

Ryou opened his eyes, only to close them again with a groan when he experienced midday sunlight dead in the eyes. The two voices continued in blatant disregard for the pained light's pounding headache.

"Unless you've forgotten, IT _WAS_ MY BODY!"

"Well, sorry, but I don't like being covered in the tainted blood of idiots! And since some STINGY unnamed PSYCHOPATH who likes blood, not mentioning any names, BAKURA, neglected to clean us up while we were unconscious, you, and thus I, was covered in the tainted blood of the Great White Idiot Himself! Do you have any idea how VIOLATED I felt?"

There was a pause in which Ryou managed to squint his eyes through the light of Ra.

"…You're gonna milk this for everything it's worth, aren't you? You're such a fucking Drama Queen."

"…Yeah. I know, but then I was also made from your latent personality traits; meaning traits that were already there but either repressed or under-developed. And besides, don't think I don't remember your manipulation of your 'friends'. I mean, seriously, you had to have been a master of the puppy eyes to get Joey and Tristan into drag-"

Ryou ignored his headache and sat bolt upright as a voice he would recognize anywhere as Bakura started howling with laughter right above him, leading him to believe that his head had been in his yami's lap.

Bakura absently reached out and pushed his swaying hikari back onto his lap. "You mean you actually got those two dweebs into drag?"

Yugi had the grace to look embarrassed. "Tea helped with the make-up, so it wasn't just me."

Ryou looked up at Bakura, since his face was all he could see at present. Was Bakura smiling? Said yami shifted his attention the last person in the room. "Did you come up with it, Elfy-Boy?"

There was a pause in which Yugi started to snicker. "Elfy-Boy?"

"…Ever call me Elfy-Boy again and I'll flush the Ring down the toilet. Happily. Perkily, even. You sound like Pegasus. And for your information, that was before I manifested, so, no, I did not come up with it."

Ryou finally figured out he would be able to see the other occupants of the room if he turned his head to the side. So he did.

"Yugi? Yugi?"

Unable to cope with the shock of seeing double, the white-haired light fainted. Again.

"How predictable."

There was the sound of Yugi's fist being introduced to Elf's head.

* * *

Ryou was once again out like a light, Bakura was happily munching on his creampuffs and watching the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre (snickering every now and then at the killing parts, I might add), Yugi was enamoured by a Rubix Cube and Elf…

Elf was _bored._

There is a saying: "A bored fox is no good to anyone but himself." The same could be said of all yamis.

Elf slunk out the door while everyone was preoccupied, fully intent on causing trouble and all-round mayhem.

Bakura smirked smugly and reclined further into his seat.

* * *

"Not now, Mokuba!"

Elf's ears pricked up and he peered around the corner of the pinball machine in time to see Kaiba walking away from a dejected Mokuba with the Other One.

Abandoning his game (to the disappointment of his fans), he made his way over to the depressed kid.

"That was kinda harsh, don'tcha think?"

The black-haired boy jumped and whipped around. "Yugi!"

Elf cut him off. "Let's get a drink. I want to talk to you."

Ten minutes later, both Elf and Mokuba were eating chocolate Sundays paid with money liberated from Bakura's now empty wallet.

"So…I guess you've noticed Kaiba and _His_ apparent obsession with each other and Yugi."

"Hai…" There was a pause. "…Did you saw 'each other and Yugi'?"

"Yes." Elf sucked some warm chocolate syrup from his spoon. "I'm Elf, Elfinite, Yugi's other Yami. Like Marik, only not crazy."

Mokuba blinked. "Let me get this straight. Yugi's boyfriend is his Yami, who looks exactly like him. On the other side, his other yami, Yami, who also looks exactly like him, is dating my brother and has a sexual fetish for Yugi and is insanely jealous of Yugi's boyfriend, whom he had no idea is actually another yami who looks like himself and Yugi."

Elf thought about it, idly sucking on his spoon. "Yeah, I guess that's pretty much it."

Mokuba giggled. "Narcissistic much?"

Elf laughed. "I guess we are."

* * *

Yugi, Elf decided when he walked into Ryou's apartment with Mokuba right behind him, was turning into a right little nympho.

Elf was just so proud.

What had prompted this decision was that Yugi and Bakura were heavily making out on the sofa to the ragged screams of American Werewolf in Paris. Though, frankly, Elf had always taken Bakura to be a top man.

Ryou had been dropped unceremoniously on the floor. Elf could work with that.


End file.
